Taking the next step

I refuse to be disappointed by last weekend's half marathon finish. After all, it was my first. And I finished. I finished with a pretty decent time in my pocket, at that. But... it could have been better.

As I mentioned in my race report, the last month or so of training leading up to race day was lackluster. I had a couple of key workout fails (one physical, one mental, both long runs) and wasn't getting the feedback I needed to feel like things were going to be okay. I had no race plan. I didn't even have a goal race pace. I was going in a bit blind on a distance that was completely foreign to me (no, I didn't hit the distance in training) and confidence was low. Very, very low.

I have several people to thank for keeping my spirits up and reminding me almost daily that all would be okay come race day, regardless of what my finish time might end up being, but one person in particular was key in getting me to that start line: Erin.

I've known Erin for about 25 years now. She was kicking my ass back then and will continue to for the rest of our lives - she finished 2nd female overall at the First Half and I know that's just the tip of the iceberg for her this year. Although she's always had my number as far as race results go, we have very similar running stories from our failings as teen-aged runners to our anxieties as adult runners. She understands what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling in ways may people won't, simply because they've never experienced what we have and do.

After a little post-race discussion, Erin and I agreed that training under her and her coach, Matt, of West Coast Endurance was the perfect next step for my running. I'm absolutely thrilled to be working with people that not only really believe in me, but are there for me every step of the way. Their support is confidence-building in itself.

And so, the journey continues with a new start. I'm stoked!

A race report!

I'm a terrible blogger. As much as I complain about 140 characters not being enough sometimes, I'm too lazy to write more and really appreciate the quickness of twitter and the community on Instagram (seriously, there are some awesome people hiding in sight there). But it's been YEARS since I raced, though I'm not sure you can define what I'm doing at this point as "racing", so I figure I should take the time to actually write about it.

I started running again last August and couldn't quite make it to 2 miles at 9:45+/mi. This past Sunday, I finished the First Half Half Marathon, which just so happened to be my first half marathon, in 1:43:57 - a 7:56/mi average.

In the weeks leading up to Sunday, I wasn't feeling very confident. I had a couple of workout fails (both long runs) that I was really stressed about and just wasn't getting the feedback I needed to plan my race. I already get race anxiety, but things were SO off that I really did consider not running.

Race morning, my alarm went off at 5:45. This little nugget tiptoed over from her blanket beside my pillow, nuzzled into my neck and got her purrrrr on.

Somehow I managed to rip myself away from kitten snuggles and got my shit together to meet my friend/neighbour, Mark, who was nice enough to drive (he killed his race in 1:23:39, a 1min PR, all while chatting with the group he was running with and only sort of training - he's an ass like that). As I said in a text to Erin, "Step 1: get out of bed. Step 2: get in the car. Accomplished both so that's something." Ya, I still wasn't sure I was going to run.

Amazingly, once we got to the race site where Mark snagged rock star parking (bonus going with someone who's raced there before), I just relaxed. I didn't feel any stress. Being with an old friend was HUGE for keeping me calm. We got our race packets, hung around a bit, did a quick warm-up and then lined up.

Clearly I'm super out of practice because I forgot to get my Garmin ready a few minutes ahead of go-time so I got to run the first mile or so without it. Not awesome when I was desperately trying not to go out too fast. Or too slow. I felt smooth and just went with it and let out a sigh of relief when it finally found satellites and read 7:50/mi pace. "Not too fast. Not too slow. Oh wait... Maybe too fast? Can I hold this pace? I don't know! OMG! I'm gonna blow up! Slow down! Why aren't my legs slowing down?!" That self-talk went on for about 12 miles.

Around mile 4 a couple of girls came up on my left together. I thought I recognized the one right beside me, but I wasn't sure. Then I remembered that, if it was who I thought it was, they would both be wearing the Asics Nimbus Lite Show. Look down... yup! That's Devon (@sole_purpose_) & Hollie (@holholden) from Instagram! Several weeks back I was hoping to run with them, but after the last few weeks of suckage, I decided to tone down my goal. I said hi, introducing myself in the process since we hadn't actually met in-person yet, and watched them pull away. Sigh. They ended up finishing two minutes ahead of me, both PRing in the process. And how great is this BRF finish?

When we hit the halfway point, people really started to drop off. Those I had been chasing were falling behind and not coming back. One guy I found to run with for a while fell off which really bummed me out because he was running exactly my pace. I didn't want to get complacent in an "easy" pace so I started to focus in on whoever was directly in front of me with the intent of passing them. I'll thank my competitive background for my mind being able to make this happen. It was going great until almost exactly at the mile 12 marker.

Mile 12. Truth sets in: I did not have enough long run mileage in me. I knew this coming in, but BAM! Side stitch. A few weeks ago I had to abort a long run because of the worst side stitch I've ever had. I stopped & started a number of times trying to get rid of it, but ended up walking home (25mins!) because every time I tried to run, I just ended up doubled over again. So imagine my mental state when this happened with only a mile left in the race. Ohhhhhhhh fuck right off!

I think I was stopped for about 10 seconds getting to watch a bunch of people I had just passed fly by me. Ugh. I got walking and could still feel the cramp, but I couldn't not run. I had to get going again. So I started to jog. "OMG! It's going away! I can't feel it! I can pick-up to my previous pace! HUZZAH! Time to pass all these people again... Let's GO!". And I did pass them. A few of them up that last hill - thank you, New Westminster hills, for all those hills I had no choice but to climb in training making me strong on hills!

On the turn to the finish, I looked up to see the time was under 1:45. Stoked! I really had no idea where I was time-wise because I had no idea for how long/far I hadn't had my Garmin going at the start of the race. 1:45 was the slowest I had wanted (and would have admitted) to run and it looked like I had beat that by 30+ seconds.

Met up with Mark and, on the way to grab water & food, ran into a guy holding an iPad who was scanning the QR codes on our race numbers so we could find out our (un)official race times. Mark had his watch going properly so it confirmed his watch and I figured I would check mine since it did take a little bit for me to get to the start line. I wish someone could have taken a picture of the look on my face when he showed me I was actually sub-1:44. #happy

While overall I'm happy with how things went because the last few weeks definitely didn't make me feel like a sub-1:44 was possible, I can't help but also be a little disappointed and playing the "what if?" game. At the end of the day, a fire has been lit and I've got some huge goals set for this year.

Onward!